![]() ![]() Guilty people often feel relieved at having gotten their offense off their chest, hoping for forgiveness. Guilt may become so unbearable that it motivates a confession. The most extreme case is the psychopath who feels no guilt about harming others. And some people are quite resistant to feeling this emotion, rarely taking responsibility for causing harm to others – ‘it was his fault’ or ‘she wouldn’t have gotten hurt if she hadn’t wanted to take the risk’. Police need to be cautious about such people who may confess to crimes they didn’t commit with little prodding to do so. Some people readily feel guilt, as if they are looking for an opportunity to take responsibility for a misdeed. Strong feelings of either emotion may also interfere with the ability to speak smoothly or coherently, which can betray a liar. The changes in behavior are involuntary, hard to suppress, just as they are in fear but guilt and fear don’t look or sound alike. The facial expression of guilt is not different from sadness, but eye contact is avoided and the head may be angled down or turned away. (Fear about being caught was discussed in Newsletter 3.) Guilt changes the sound of the voice. Guilt about breaking the other person’s trust, compounded by lying about it, is the second emotion that can betray a lie. Not every cheater realizes ahead of time how guilty he or she might feel afterwards. When I asked these non-cheaters “why not”, they said they would feel too guilty. Men as often as women said they wouldn’t cheat. They didn’t differ from those who said “yes” (that they would cheat) in whether they were married or single, if married, how long they had been married, and if in a committed relationship, how long they had known their lover. ![]() While it is tempting to make such a judgment, we must tolerate ambiguity until we can gather more information to be certain that the hot spot is due to lying and not some other trigger.Why do lies fail? I asked people “If you could be absolutely certain that your lover would never find out, would you have a one-night stand with a very attractive person?” About half said “no”. We risk making Othello’s error, jumping to the conclusion that an emotion we observe is due to lying without considering other factors that might have triggered the emotion. Emotions that don’t fit the context can be a bit spot, but emotions can occur for many reasons, not just because of lying to someone.Įmotion signals don’t tell us what brought them forth. It is important to remember that there are no signs of lying itself, only hot spots. Or a liar may feel either of these emotions about him or her self for engaging in the lie. In a similar fashion, a liar may feel disgust toward his or her target. The liar may be angry at his or her target for a variety of reasons, but may believe it is necessary to conceal the anger in order to succeed in the lie. These are not the only emotions that may be felt about engaging in a serious lie, one in which the consequences matter for the liar and the target. It is most likely when the liar’s target is considered to be difficult to fool, and others allied with the liar are present who know that a lie is being perpetrated. Duping delight is hard to contain, often motivating bragging that will betray a lie. Contempt, excitement, and enjoyment are all likely to be rolled into duping delight. Still another emotion about engaging in lying is what I have called duping delight, which I have defined as the sheer pleasure obtained by taking the risk and meeting the challenge of having control over another person. When lying to someone is not authorized, or there is ambiguity about whether there is an obligation to be truthful, guilt about lying may be aroused, especially when the liar’s target can’t be easily faulted as mean or unfair, and the liar and his or her target share values and expect to have a continuing relationship. ![]() Guilt is not likely when the lie is authorized, such as the lie by an undercover police agent, a spy planted by another country, or a salesman explicitly encouraged to misrepresent a product. Guilt is another emotion that may be experienced during certain lies. If the target of a person’s lie has a reputation for being gullible, or if the liar has been repeatedly successful in the past in telling just such a lie to his or her target, or a person very similar to the target, it is unlikely that the liar will feel or express fear. Even then, not all lairs will fear being caught lying. But fear is only generated when the stakes are high. The fear of being caught lying is the most common emotion felt about engaging in a lie. The three emotions most frequently experienced by people when they are lying are fear, guilt, and somewhat surprisingly, delight. Excerpt from Emotions Revealed The range of emotions we feel when lying to someone
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